My prayer

My prayer for you on this fine Tuesday morning:

Ironic.

It's ironic how the source of greatest joy is also the source for greatest suffering...









on repeat today...

Alive.

This morning I read Romans 8-17 and it spoke straight into my heart.  Had to share.  I'm just recapping in my own words.

Paul starts off by saying, If your sinful nature controls you, it will will control you mind, producing negativity, but if the Holy Spirit controls your spirit, than it produces things pleasing to God.  He continues to contrast the two in more depth.  The spirit controlled by the Holy Spirit is light and peaceful, but the spirit controlled by the sinful nature is one of hostility, muck, & general negativity, a heavy blanket.  Then Paul says - but wait! Don't Forget!! You ARE controlled by the Holy Spirit!  Remember, God lives in YOU!  Your spirit is ALIVE!  You don't have to live in the muck, You are FREE!  Don't live like a fearful slave.  Remember who you are - you are a child of God.  He wants you to start living like one - to share in His joy, to live the good life.  This doesn't mean life is easy, but it is indeed good.

This passage just breathed fresh air into my soul.  Lately I have had experiences that I am not proud of.   It is so easy to focus on my failings, my shortcomings, to get bogged down, to wear that heavy blanket.  I think that's one of Satan's tricks, to make the negative so pervasive and so....final.  If we only focus on our shortcomings and the negative, we lose sight of who God is, who we are, and who He has called us to be and the incredible beauty of that entire dynamic.

As I read this passage, I felt like God had pulled away my blinders, allowing me to see the periphery.  Into my soul I heard, "This.  This is who you are because of Me.  So go.  Live. Drink Deeply. & Love Freely."

New Year

I have never been one to make resolutions...they seem too limiting.  And there seems to not be much forgiveness when they aren't met.

What I do believe in is setting intentions.  With intentions, there is a freedom for the intention to be expressed in a multitude of ways.  And there is a playfulness when exploring the different expressions of an intention...

This year's intention is to love.  Intentionally & purposefully...however easy or difficult.  I've realized this last week that I'm really good at loving when it's easy, when I'm joyful, and when people are like me.  I am terrible at loving when it's hard, when I'm frustrated, and when people make poor choices and are different from me.

I know that love is cultivated in my life through praying, stretching, serving, & creating.


Here's to a lovely 2012

2011.

Now that the craziness of Christmas is over, I actually have some time to think!  And thus comes the necessary reflections of 2011.

I can clearly remember my HIGH expectations of 2011.  And I have to admit they were met.  2011 was incredible.  As I'm sitting down to reflect, I'm realizing this was a defining year for me.  I've really started to "come into my own".  It was a year of new things - yoga, career, relationship, vegan, GF...(although the veganism didn't last long!).  It was a year of growth - I AM, TRM skills, externship, relationship.

In 2011, I realized my passion of discipleship - discipleship defined as helping someone unlock who they are, and using that for higher potential.  (Thank you to Samuel, Elaine, Genevieve, Falisha, DeeDee for helping my realization as well as giving me opportunities to practice).

And now onto 2012.  2012 is going to be exponentially greater.   To be honest, when I think of 2012, I am scared shitless...but also exhilarated at the same time.  2012 is my year.  It is now or never.

Sometimes.

 Sometimes I think I know what's best, I think I know what I need to do, who I need to be, where I need to go, the steps to take to get there...and then I realize that this, this right here is just fine.  Here, in the now, is exactly RIGHT.

Right now (as stated earlier this week) , I have a deep thirst for doing, for being, for making a difference.  My eyes are wide open to all the need that is around me and around the world.  I went to a Free the Slaves benefit this past week that really inspired me The only choice I have is to do something.

I had a couple of really great experiences at work this week.  No, I didn't miraculously "fix" a kid's "r", or teach him language in a great way...actually our session had nothing to do with speech or language.  After working with these 2 boys, I felt alive.  It was one of those experiences, that I felt, "Man, I was created for this very moment".   On my drive back to the office, I realized that this is what I want to do, this is what I am created to do.  I've learned that working with people, listening to them, helping them realize their potential is quite possibly my favorite thing on this planet.  This is how I can do something.  So, I began to toy with the idea of going back to school to become a licensed clinical social worker...To have the credential, to be "legit" at this....and to do this full-time...

But then I came across this yesterday:

Bingo...

I realized the beauty of these interactions are that they were natural...

And so here's to life with open arms...just as I am.

Discontentment

There is a discontentment, an anxiousness, almost an excitement deep in my soul...the kind that moves a person...moves a person to greater, to more...

I feel like I am on the cusp of something big...what it is, I'm not sure....

Crazy things have been happening...crazy things that are NOT coincidence.  Conversations, chance meetings that just build upon each other...

I have a deep urge in to me to go, to do. 

I don't know when...I don't know what...but I am adventurously expectant for that, that is to come...